Tag - Daily loving

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Why would parents need help? If they are “good” moms and dads, aren’t they supposed to know?!

Dear Friend,

Great questions:  “Why should parents need help?  Aren’t we (moms and dads) supposed to know….and if we get help does that mean we messed up along the way?”

Let’s take a step back.

Have you ever stood VERY CLOSE to a tree, like with your nose touching the bark, and admired the forest?  Probably not.

When we have our nose to the grindstone (le nez dans le guidon) it is like a camera with a high zoooom lens.  We see details of the specifics in front of us and lose touch of the big picture. 

And have you noticed how pain acts in a similar fashion?  Time is short.  We want relief NOW.  No waiting.  I love how the 17th century gambler, Chevalier de Méré, puts it, “Il n’est pas bon d’être malheureux mais il est bon de l’avoir été.” (“It is not good to be sad but it is good to have been.”)

The Home Is Fun web-workshops enable parents to take a step back. Even to identify the benefit we gain (are currently gaining) from overcoming challenges.  Many parenting experts encourage (instruct) moms and dads to take time off, but how?  When?  An event with an outside person facilitates the process.  We revisit sensitive issues from a fun and fresh perspective.  The focus is on solutions, not on blame…therefore not on the pain that family members suffer.  The web-workshops help turn subjects of tension into opportunities of learning.

Of course parents can do this on their own too.  And yet, realizing the need to step back AND committing to doing so requires a change of posture.  That’s tough.  An outside catalyst, such as a person, an event, an activity, help change happen more smoothly.

As you know, I believe parents are leaders.  It is a common professional practice to organize leadership seminars and team building events.  Consider the Home Is Fun web-workshops to be just that:  your family team brainstorming bonanza.

Another similar reference could be a hackathon.  Ideally, companies encourage creativity.  A one-time event…with a specified focus…which unites people in an out-of-the-ordinary context..and which offers a prize (!) boosts inventiveness to a higher level.

The goal of the Home Is Fun workshops is to strengthen the relationship within YOUR super family.  We present a fresh perspective SO THAT YOUR family can benefit by exploring it together.   We pose questions you might not have thought to ask.  That’s normal; you have been managing the busy daily routine.  The answers to the questions you explored remain for you.  The process of mutual exploration is for you.  The thrill of discovery of each other is for you.  The memory of creating solutions together is for you.  The ease of life that comes from your personalized solutions is for YOU.

Hope this answers your questions.  We love hearing them so keep on asking.

How patient is your love?

A couple’s 4 years from “I will” to “I do”...and I, the parenting trainer, didn’t last 1 week... 

Here are the stories:

The Romance Story

This Valentine’s Day I attended an extra, extra-special wedding. Four years ago, the groom had to leave his home country, Pakistan, to seek political asylum in France. As a forthright pastor, his life was threatened. His fiancé’s was not; she stayed behind.

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Should our family define our values?

Isn’t it exasperating when you ask your child to be kind to his friend...and he goes off to be mean to his sibling!

“But I did what you said!” your kid responds all confused.

Maybe its time to talk about values in a different way.

Sign up NOW for our free family webinar for parents and kids to discuss values together.

Join us on February 7 at 14:00 Paris time for a family activity to help your family together define your values AND what that means in your home.

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Top 60 Gifts of 2014...They're All People. How is YOUR Support Network?

It’s been hard to move into 2015, and partly because I had not closed up 2014. Here’s to looking back (kindly) so as to look forward (hopefully and hope-filled-ly).

My greatest profits from 2014 result from investing in relationships:  personal, professional, communal, and spiritual.  Sometimes it"s one individual; other times it's a group.  High returns?  Totally!...even when sometimes there are yeeeeeaaaaaarrrrrs of dedicating loving before the returns flow back in abundance.  Still worth it.

:-)

 

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Word of the Month: Elaborate

In Paris, school begins next week, the first Tuesday of September.  Although école does conjure up images of friends, I mostly think of classes, homework, and the recurring feedback teachers give children:   “Approfondir!” Elaborate!

What does "elaborate" really mean? 

Who’s job is it to elaborate?  Just the students...or teachers and parents as well?

Where else does the concept apply?  At work?  At home? 

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Turn Work into Fun

Running = WORK (in my book).  It’s effort, sweat, and sore muscles.

And yet, I wanted to run yesterday as The Color Runners pranced by me during the Paris race.  It’s a 5K race and every kilometer is marked by a shower of color.  They call it “The Happiest 5K on the planet.”

What if we could infuse our home management with such joy?  Here’s my go at it:

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RESPECT You Can See, Hear, Feel...even Taste!

An upsetting situation is coming to the fore in my son’s class.  Bullying.  Among girls.  They’re not breaking bones with sticks and stones; they’re hurting with words.

How did it start?  I’m not sure (and is anyone?)

When did it begin?  Some time back...but it’s irrelevant now.  Today, bullying is here.

Who does it?  In this bullying instance, I know all of the concerned people:  parents and kids.  Our children have been in the same class for six years.  We know these families.  They're all delightful people.  Every one of them.  

Without a doubt the parents of the kids involved hope to pass on the value of mutual respect to their children.  And yet, a connection between beliefs and actions is not being made.

Passing on our values to the next generation is one of parents’ deep desires and formidable feats.  So much easier said than done!  I don’t have a foolproof method for passing on our principles to our children.

I do have some hard-learned lessons on communication with people from a different culture (I’m an American living in France) who speak another mother tongue.  After all, our children do live in a confusing generational culture and talk differently, “u no wat i mean?”

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Boosting Family Love: It Worked for Us!

We had a LOVERLY (!) time at the Boost Love Family Workshop last week-end. I just loooove this picture of BEAMING kids when they are so confident of being loved and of having their love received.

Here’s our vision.  Great leaders make great parents.  At work, we frame a vision, communicate it, and organize to make it happen.  Isn’t that what we do at home too?

We got inspired by business growth (new customers, new products & services, greater value of each) to boost love through building up our relationships, the frequency of our interactions, and the depth of our communication.

I just love your workshops! You are so engaging and motivating and inspiring! (Thank you.  I do thrive on affirmation.  Smile.  Well, GRIN!)  I guess what helps the most is the practical way you put things into perspective for us.  Things we never necessarily think about in a structured way - but should!!!...I'm looking forward to the next one!!!”

Read on and check out the pictures.

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Boost Love - Parent & Child Workshop in Paris

For every “NO!” how often do you encourage?

So much of our family conversation seems tainted by critique or correction.  Maybe it's because so much of our discussion centers around giving instructions. 

Do these sound familiar?

Dad: "How is homework coming along?  Did you do it WELL?"

or

Mom: "For how long did you brush your teeth?"

Kid:  "Why do you ask me again and again?"

Mom:  "Didn't you know a mom is a spy?!  Besides, too often I find your toothbrush dry!"

Great homes share exchanges like these.  They also include more...


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When the "Wrong" Parenting Tool Becomes the Right One...and the Source of Inspiration

Picture this dilemma:  It’s a GORGEOUS day (no, this is not the problem).  You’re on the ski slopes and there is fresh powder (still not the family challenge).  It’s lunchtime and you have no cash...but you have freshly made, delicious sandwiches (still in suspense...) 

Here is the clincher:  you would like to enjoy your simple feast sitting down BUT, restaurants are in business and not in charity; they reserve seats for clients who purchase.  You would rather not freeze your rear off by sprawling in the snow.  Besides have you tried sitting Indian style with ski boots?  Ouch!  Squatting could be an option, but how restful is that?  And to add challenge to difficulty, you would appreciate an amazing view.

Life is tough...or full of promise.

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