Tag - Responsibility

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Why would parents need help? If they are “good” moms and dads, aren’t they supposed to know?!

Dear Friend,

Great questions:  “Why should parents need help?  Aren’t we (moms and dads) supposed to know….and if we get help does that mean we messed up along the way?”

Let’s take a step back.

Have you ever stood VERY CLOSE to a tree, like with your nose touching the bark, and admired the forest?  Probably not.

When we have our nose to the grindstone (le nez dans le guidon) it is like a camera with a high zoooom lens.  We see details of the specifics in front of us and lose touch of the big picture. 

And have you noticed how pain acts in a similar fashion?  Time is short.  We want relief NOW.  No waiting.  I love how the 17th century gambler, Chevalier de Méré, puts it, “Il n’est pas bon d’être malheureux mais il est bon de l’avoir été.” (“It is not good to be sad but it is good to have been.”)

The Home Is Fun web-workshops enable parents to take a step back. Even to identify the benefit we gain (are currently gaining) from overcoming challenges.  Many parenting experts encourage (instruct) moms and dads to take time off, but how?  When?  An event with an outside person facilitates the process.  We revisit sensitive issues from a fun and fresh perspective.  The focus is on solutions, not on blame…therefore not on the pain that family members suffer.  The web-workshops help turn subjects of tension into opportunities of learning.

Of course parents can do this on their own too.  And yet, realizing the need to step back AND committing to doing so requires a change of posture.  That’s tough.  An outside catalyst, such as a person, an event, an activity, help change happen more smoothly.

As you know, I believe parents are leaders.  It is a common professional practice to organize leadership seminars and team building events.  Consider the Home Is Fun web-workshops to be just that:  your family team brainstorming bonanza.

Another similar reference could be a hackathon.  Ideally, companies encourage creativity.  A one-time event…with a specified focus…which unites people in an out-of-the-ordinary context..and which offers a prize (!) boosts inventiveness to a higher level.

The goal of the Home Is Fun workshops is to strengthen the relationship within YOUR super family.  We present a fresh perspective SO THAT YOUR family can benefit by exploring it together.   We pose questions you might not have thought to ask.  That’s normal; you have been managing the busy daily routine.  The answers to the questions you explored remain for you.  The process of mutual exploration is for you.  The thrill of discovery of each other is for you.  The memory of creating solutions together is for you.  The ease of life that comes from your personalized solutions is for YOU.

Hope this answers your questions.  We love hearing them so keep on asking.

Report Card Stress? Help your child WANT to improve

Is your chlid’s REPORT CARD TIME a moment of stress ?

Sign up for our Cease Fire over the Report Card webinar to get kids motivated to do their best.

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Family Feedback-The Gift Money Can't Buy

Join us for a FREE Family Webinar where the kids give parents feedback to help make family the best it can be.

January 4, 2015 from 11:00 am EST.  15 minutes of introduction to coach the entire family, and you are off!  We're staying online to answer your questions and guide you through as needed.

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Word of the Month: Elaborate

In Paris, school begins next week, the first Tuesday of September.  Although école does conjure up images of friends, I mostly think of classes, homework, and the recurring feedback teachers give children:   “Approfondir!” Elaborate!

What does "elaborate" really mean? 

Who’s job is it to elaborate?  Just the students...or teachers and parents as well?

Where else does the concept apply?  At work?  At home? 

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Love by Allowing Kids to Fail…and Find Their Own Solutions... Without Mom and Dad Getting on Their Back

Today I received a huge “I know you love me, Mom,” from my 20 year old son. 

Nothing gushy-wooshy about it.  I allowed him to do things his way:  first to get himself into an awkward mess and then to find his own solution out of it. 

He expressed thanks for my confidence in him.

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No Feedback = Stuck in the Muck without Realizing It

How can one change?

- The "establishment”? 

- My child?  

- Me?! 

Have you experienced a less-than-optimal situation and wanted to help it evolve only to be told, “This is the way it is.  PERIOD.”

I have.  Twice this week!   Each instance is characterized by the absence of feedback.

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Positive Discipline Blunder = My Birthday Gift

I have just returned from three day training with Positive Discipline founder, Jane Nelsen.  We learned to focus on teaching our children the life skills we soooo deeeeeeply desire to pass on:  integrity, responsibility, humor, problem-solving, respect....  You know them too.

Jane Nelsen regularly asks,

"How did we come up with the CRAZY idea that parents should make kids feel worse in order for them to be better?!"

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Exploring Courage: It Worked for Us

June 6, 2014 marks the 70th anniversary of D-Day.  Remember?  That’s when Allied forces landed on the Normandy beaches to fight for freedom.  9 000 Allied soldiers died on that day to enable 100 000 fellow military to march, swim, fly, and drop into Normandy. 

Freedom.

Brotherhood.

Sacrifice.

Victory.

D-Day is HUGE Deal Day still in our year.

Many of these young soldiers knew their lives were at stake.  Faced with danger, they went forward anyway.  That’s courage.

Would you and I and our kids call out “present” when facing challenge?  How do we encourage courage in our homes?  Try these simple, entertaining, and rich ways. 

Read on to learn about our TWO free downloads or click below for the first.

Free downloads

 

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When the "Wrong" Parenting Tool Becomes the Right One...and the Source of Inspiration

Picture this dilemma:  It’s a GORGEOUS day (no, this is not the problem).  You’re on the ski slopes and there is fresh powder (still not the family challenge).  It’s lunchtime and you have no cash...but you have freshly made, delicious sandwiches (still in suspense...) 

Here is the clincher:  you would like to enjoy your simple feast sitting down BUT, restaurants are in business and not in charity; they reserve seats for clients who purchase.  You would rather not freeze your rear off by sprawling in the snow.  Besides have you tried sitting Indian style with ski boots?  Ouch!  Squatting could be an option, but how restful is that?  And to add challenge to difficulty, you would appreciate an amazing view.

Life is tough...or full of promise.

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Family Annual Review Peek-a-boo—To Mom, be more generous. To child, learn through a job.

We are coming to a close of our Family Annual Review of 2013.  One son remains to give and receive his feedback with his parents.  This is the fourth in the series of posts to give you a glimpse into one our most precious and powerful family moments. 

Click here for our How To’s.  Read on to learn how my son told me to be more generous and I encouraged him to grow by working simple jobs of manual labor or service.

We are seated at the dinner table and the boys chose to go around in the order of seating.  It’s our second son who finally got the floor.

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